Dear Alf #45

Welcome back, Rehabbers! Rehabbers? Where are you all? Wait, did you not believe me when I said this was a weekly course? Well you’ve failed…

Welcome back, Rehabbers! Rehabbers? Where are you all? Wait, did you not believe me when I said this was a weekly course? Well you’ve failed the first test already. Looks like I’m going to have to be a little crueller to be kind. In the meantime, bring on the questions!

Bippo: Who does the naming process for all the Mud…lings? Mudokids? Is it the parent(s)? Do you have some sort of appointed official to hand out a specific name? It might seem obvious but it might not be, seeing as your whole lot is a pretty wacky bunch.

Alf: Sometimes our momma names us, the rest of the time we kinda name ourselves. I don’t remember ever being told my name, it was just what everybody always called me. Apart from middle management. They always called me “Hey you, do ya stinkin’ job ya bum!” I didn’t like that name. Too wordy.

As I was reading the April edition of Dear Alf and a question sparked another: There are bird portals that Abe can use to reach different areas that definitely don’t contain the Monsaic Sanctum or your famous tea. What if some of the portals Abe sends the others through take them to those areas? They’re usually far deadlier than what the current predicament might be before entering.

Alf: Oh my odd, that’s… that right there is what they call nightmare flub! Nah, I wouldn’t worry about it. You gotta trust the birds! The portals that take Abe to them places, they always stay open for him and never let anyone else through. They know, man. They know.

Lastly a short question, would you take a bullet for Abe? As in a fired bullet. From a gun. Fired by a very upset and mean-looking Slig. Right at Abe. With you next to him. Next to Abe, not the Slig, don’t be silly. Oops, I guess this wasn’t that short after all.

Alf: You know them so-called ‘product delivery firearms’? You might have seen ’em, the SnUzis and BlitzPackers and that? They strike you with a dose of addictive goodies and you’re hooked to their consumer goods, desperate to work in the factories just to get your next precious hit. I’d take that bullet, then Abe can rescue me and I can cure myself at my own Rehab. Hyeh, these thought puzzles are fun.

Curtis: hello alf i have been a fan of this franchise for 14 years and my questions are these regarding the up coming new ‘n’ tasty a simple question and somewhat pointless but i would hate it if i didnt ask the sligs in new ‘n’ tasty will they have the orignal masks from the first game or the other round lens ones from munches oddysee.

Alf: A little from Column Abe and a little from Column Abey.

regarding my hand of odd question fairly simple is hand of odd a fan rumor or is it real thank you for your time.

Alf: Hand of Odd ain’t no rumor, it’s a real thing that we’ve spent time on in the past. But for various reasons each time it comes up, other things end up taking priority. Maybe we’ll go back to it one day, maybe one day we’ll even release the thing! But we’re not working on it right now.

Well there goes another week. Hey, this new regime is working out just great! I hope you’re all liking your super new ultra-regular morsels of tea and truth. If your question wasn’t answered, don’t worry! Everyone’s question is being saved, so you just gotta hang in there.

In the meantime, keep your queries and wonderings flooding in! Let’s not let this wave settle down! Get your questions to Oddworld Inhabitants on Facebook, Twitter or email, and check back every Friday to see if yours is one of the questions answered by the Great Alf!